My Journey to Rebellious Health

Dr Emma Presern

This week is National Self-Care week. As a GP trainee, my mental health took a nose dive in 2019 and I learnt the hard and lonely way that self-care as a healthcare professional is fundamental and lifesaving. And no one is going to do it for you. But there are so many people, and organisations who will support you when you decide to prioritise you, finally.

The journey of reconnection and healing, as a healthcare professional, is both confronting and enlightening. Self-care is not all warm baths and massages. At times, it’s really not very pretty. It can be confusing, messy, traumatic, disconcerting, lonely. At other times, it’s full of joy, love, forgiveness, connection, inner peace, compassion. And hope.

Rebellious Health and The RE Project was born from the lessons learned over the last five years during this personal and at times lonely journey through burnout, disillusionment, and then discovering what recovery, self-care and healing really mean. That difficult period and the sudden deterioration in my mental health marked the start of an ongoing path of soul-searching and healing which have shaped what I now call the Rebellious Health Pillars. But Rebellious Health is more than just a personal philosophy; it represents a desire to challenge a healthcare system that I believe is failing its workforce and patients alike. The current system fuels burnout, and demoralisation, whilst suppressing the creativity and humanity of those working within it. I believe we can, and we must, do things differently.

Growing up in Nepal, Pakistan, and Zimbabwe, I was surrounded by nature, but also by health and social inequalities. Those experiences probably influenced my decision to become a doctor, but I later learnt too, that many of us enter the profession subconsciously as “wounded healers”. As “wounded healers,” we frequently suppress our own needs, which can lead to burnout, mental and physical health issues, addiction and tragically, suicide. For me, that suppression culminated in 2019, when the weight of unresolved trauma and personal life events, unhealthy shift patterns, and the moral injury of working in a strained system became too much and I was given a stark wake-up call. No one at work would have realised, because we can be masters at putting on a mask.

During my early years as a doctor, I was fuelled by learning, mental stimulation, camaraderie, and the diversity of people I encountered. But over time I began to understand how inadequate the system was for both patients and staff. The disconnection between mind, body, spirit, and environment in our system was glaring. I saw how government policies eroded community and societal structures in favour of corporate wealth, leaving healthcare workers to carry an unsustainable burden.

I continued to struggle through a two-year period of worsening emotional exhaustion and burnout, until in 2021, I took a year-long pause from clinical medicine. That time allowed me to reflect on the meaning of true health and wellbeing, for myself, my colleagues, and my patients. I pursued a diploma in lifestyle medicine, explored breathwork and other alternative practices and spent much of my time in nature. I embarked on a six-week solo hike through the Slovene Mountains and these experiences provided the clarity and inspiration to plant the seed for Rebellious Health.

Returning to clinical practice in East London with renewed purpose, I found that the systemic and cultural issues at the heart of my burnout remained unchanged. While completing my GP training, I had little headspace for creativity or advocacy. The challenges within the NHS (chronic underfunding, relentless demand, and workforce attrition) continued to take a toll. Despite this, I held onto the vision for Rebellious Health.

I’ve now moved to the mountains of North Wales and officially launched The RE Project this year. This project is deeply personal—a culmination of lived experiences, creative energy, and a belief in the power of reconnection back to self, back to each other, and finally to nature. It’s a safe space and a community for clinicians who want to think differently, a bit out of the box, to heal, to challenge the status quo and to reconnect back to a life of purpose. Wouldn’t it be beautiful to foster an environment for collective healing and post traumatic growth within healthcare?